Friday, May 25, 2007

A definate sign you have lots of children...

Most of the time I still feel 17. Of course a wiser 17 but still youthful nonetheless. Then I pass by my reflection and secretely mock the pudgy woman with all the children attached to her legs until I realize it's ME. ;-)

We bought a 12p van a few months ago. The kids call it our "church bus". They like it because we can fit friends in the car now. I like it because we don't get tickets for speeding in a "church bus".

I snuck out to the grocery store by myself this afternoon and left the kids with DH. Much to my dismay the elderly gentleman insisted on bringing my groceries out to the van. It's not that I'm anti-social, I enjoy talking to people. It wasn't even that my van was messy, today it actually wasn't. But I just hate when they force me to let them bring my groceries out. It's a pet peeve - I don't know why. It's just awkward.

After convincing the gentleman that there wasn't in fact, any room for the groceries in the very back of the van he finally brought it to the passenger side. I went to help put the bags in but was shunned from that too. *sigh* When I opened the door he said, "Where is everyone?". I told him they were at home with daddy. He looked at me kind of funny and then said, "Oh, I thought you were with the group home!" LOL

That's in the top 10 list of signs you have lots of kids. When strangers assume you're toting around the group home in your van.

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Mooooooving right along

My 7yo daughter is quite proud of her teeth. She's waiting for some to fall out and they've been really loose for awhile now. She will proudly tell you they're crooked and shaped like a cow. Don't believe her? Take a look for yourself. This image is NOT enhanced in any way except for the red circle I added.



Friday, May 18, 2007

Worship 'til your heart explodes

Our 9yo son was watching American Idol with me tonight and he turns to me and says, "Mom, you should really come to church early enough to hear them sing, the music makes your heart feel like it's coming out of your chest."

Yeah, because of our late schedule it's quite difficult to get us and all the kids up and ready for Sunday School so we have friends pick up our oldest and bring him early to class. He gets up bright and early, gets showered/dressed/fed pretty much on his own (I stand in the corner and mumble once in awhile coffee-in-hand), eagerly. DH and I head over for the main service but we usually miss the music.

DH reflected with me tonight after I told him what our son said. He said when he was a boy he went to church to hang out with his friends, he wanted nothing to do with the worship/praise/studying part. We both think it's pretty cool that our son does care about what should be the most important aspect in a church: praising, worshipping, and learning about God.

Sometimes I feel like our kids are turning out right in spite of us instead of partly because of us, especially lately. God is definately graceful. :-)

Just got caught up on American Idol *spoiler*

And I guess it's sad how much that show can affect me. I cried real tears for Melinda. First when she went home and was SO overwhelmed by the support and then when she got voted off. I don't want to be rude, and in the off chance Blake or someone who knows Blake was googling and came across this blog I don't want to say anything hurtful or malicious, because I don't mean it that way. But Melinda and Blake are like Filet Mignon and Hamburger. They're both good and I would be happy sitting to either but there's a different expectation I guess is what I'm trying to say. Blake is fun, cute, energetic, young, creative, & entertaining. Melinda just makes the hairs on your neck stand up. She's that good. But I'm guessing a lot of the voters are youngish which would explain it. But I thought for sure it would be Melinda and Jordan and I'd bet anything so did all 3 of them. I know she'll move on to bigger and better things and I look forward to buying many amazing CD's. But she's the kind of woman I wish I could be and the kind of woman I pray my daughters become. Graceful, kind, humble, happy, blessed. I'll miss you Melinda!

OK - speaking of American Idol rejects (yeah, I bounce back quick haha) do y'all remember Mandisa from last season? Adorable, happy, outgoing Christian, she sang a Christian "Mary, Mary" song on the show in fact. I *loved* her. WEll, she's coming out with an album this summer - her song, "Only the World" is already playing on the Christian station. I can't help but dance when I hear it. Emily, you may not want to listen to it in public - haha. But anyway, listen to it at her Myspace site and click on "Only the World" if it's not the song playing. I promise you'll feel like dancing!

Based of the fact I was crying like a baby all during American Idol and I've been kind of snappish with everyone around me I'm guessing I'll be paid a visit tomorrow but an unwelcome wench. *sigh* It's kind of sad when you know it's coming and all your husband can think is "better get a last minute quickie in then". ROFL Sorry, TMI? I'm amusing myself.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

White boy dancing

OK this is the short version but it's so cute! My son is the one on the left. Darn unsocialized homeschoolers! ;-)

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Happy Mothers Day

My mom sent me this VIA e-mail and I thought it was the perfect tribute for Mother's Day.

"So, we had this great 10 year old cat named Jack who just
recently died. Jack was a great cat and the kids would carry him
around and sit on him and nothing ever bothered him. He used to
hang out and nap all day long on this mat in our bathroom.

Well we have 3 kids and at the time of this story they were
4 years old, 3 years old and 1 year old. The middle one is Eli. Eli really
loves chapstick. LOVES it. He kept asking to use my chapstick and
then losing it. So finally one day I showed him where in the
bathroom I keep my chapstick and how he could use it whenever he
wanted to but he needed to put it right back in the drawer when he was done.
>
Last year on Mother's Day, we were having the typical rush
around and try to get ready for Church with everyone crying and
carrying on. My two boys are fighting over the toy in the cereal
box. I am trying to nurse my little one at the same time I am putting on my make-up.
Everything is a mess and everyone has long forgotten that this is a wonderful day
to honor me and the amazing job that is motherhood.

We finally have the older one and the baby loaded in the car
and I am looking for Eli. I have searched everywhere and I finally
round the corner to go into the bathroom. And there was Eli. He was
applying my chapstick very carefully to Jack's . . . Rear end.Eli
looked right into my eyes and said "chapped." Now if you have a cat, you know that he is right--their little butts do look pretty chapped. And, frankly, Jack didn't
seem to mind.

And the only question to really ask at that point was whether it
was the FIRST time Eli had done that to the cat's behind or the hundredth.

And THAT is my favorite Mother's Day moment ever because it reminds
us that no matter how hard we try to civilize these glorious little
creatures, there will always be that day when you realize they've
been using your chapstick on the cat's butt."


HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Voices That Care - Operation Desert Storm Music Video

OK this song made me feel warm and fuzzy and laugh out loud all at once. Watch out for Will Smiths part - it comes without warning! ROFL

I wish they would do something like this again instead of constantly bickering about whether we should or shouldn't be there. The fact is people ARE, and they need us.

I remembered what I wanted to post!

And it had nothing to do with the kids, well not directly anyway.

Do you remember how when (if) you used to do your wild & crazy partying days? Almost everyone I knew had a friend they would take to the clubs. She was just a little plainer than them, or wider, or had more acne. Something, anything to make them look a little better. I had 2 best friends that I went out with most often. 1 took all the attention from me and one helped me gain the attention. Oh don't look at me like that, I'm not shallow it's just the way it was people! If it helps it's not really about looks as it is about confidence. Men were drawn to my 1 best friend, she was pretty but she wasn't Cameron Diaz but she was treated as such because she *felt* like Miss. Diaz. ;-) By the time I figured all that out I was married with 3 children. Too little too late. LOL

Anyway, my whole point is I like hanging out with people with less children than myself. They put me on this supermom pedostal by saying things like, "Yeah, bedtime is hard but I can't imagine how hard it is for you with five!" They're probably pitying me but it makes me feel good, strong - me woman me keep 5 kids alive. That type of primal thing. ;-)

Well today at the luncheon there were 2 women I hadn't met before. One was a missionary who lives in Cambodia, sweet sweet lady. I'm sitting next to her and something came up that prompted me to say, "With 5 children 9 and under I just don't even try" and she asked how many. I repeated it and she says as casual and flippant as one would mention the weather, "Oh, I had eight 9 and under". I was dismissed, demoted, *poofed* off my pedostal.

Any childless people want to be my friend?

Leading is not dominating

OK this is why I need to write things down. One of my kids said something snarky or silly today and I remember thinking "definately gotta blog that one!" and alas, it's completely slipped my mind. *sigh*

Went to a really sweet luncheon today. The older women in the church had us younger moms come over and they spoiled us rotten with healthy food (some covered in chocolate), punch, hand waxing, nail polishing, & free homemade lotions. Someone commented on the food at the same time I commented on the atmosphere and it came out sounding like "chocolate covered peace & quiet". Doesn't that sound nice? Isn't that every mama's dream? lol

OK so I've been reading a GREAT book called Husbands Who Wont Lead and Wives Who Wont Follow . Something I read this morning really stuck with me all day. DH and I talked about it because he was raised in a household of STRONG women and I was raised by a feminist so we like to keep each other in check of what we're rebelling against or becoming like because of our childhoods. Add to that the traditional Christian outlook on husband/wife and we just end up confused! But the book made me realize there is no domination required to be a submissive wife. We are equals and it's OK to say that out loud and shave my armpits. ;-) In 1 Corinthinians 11:11-12 Apostle Paul writes, "In the Lord, neither is woman independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. For as the woman originates from the man, so also the man has his birth through the woman; and all things originate from God. "

Wow.

I have heard the arguement from chauvanistic men (extreme ones, I'm all for a manly man ladies) that women came from men, therefore they must be inferior. We *must* do as they wish and serve them hand and foot. But man is BORN from woman. The circle is complete. We are equals, without one we couldn't have the other. I have never seen it so plain before.

Men should be leaders. I believe that. I believe it's a natural born thing for men to protect, lead, prosper. Just as I believe it's a natural born thing for a woman to nurture, care for, & prosper. We're, as a majority, built that way. But as the book says, Leadership does not mean dominating.

"For all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourself with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male or female; for you are all one in Christ". Galations 3:27-28

And finally Matthew 20:25-28 tells us "You know that rulers of the gentiles lord it over them, and their great men exercise authority over them. It is not so among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant, and whoeer wishes to become first among you shall be your slave; just as the son of man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life a ransom for many."

The answer is right there folks! Plain to see. DH and I talked about how if we did more for each other, without expecting anything back, both of us, how things would be so much smoother. We should be caring for each other always, in every way. If we're both doing our jobs we'll both be fulfilled, happy, even able to serve others. Our cups will overflow! It's not a 1 sided deal. What a revelation. Of course it's more difficult to put into practice. Like DH said we both have expectations of the other and it will take time to put those aside and just do things because.

Let me leave you with this beautiful quote. Now we do believe in spanking but we believe it should be the last means, not the common ground. And I'm a yeller so this was really good for me to read.

"Power is of two kinds. One is obtained by the fear of punishment and the other by the art of love. Power based on love is a thousand times more effective and permanent than the one derived by the fear of punishment." ~ Mohandas Gandhi

What wise words. Ones I have not lived by and will take time to process and develop. Probably because it's a lot harder to use love as a motivation than it is to use fear. Don't get me wrong, I love my children & husband and they know it. It's just I've felt like I've lost control of things a lot time ago and have been putting out fires for way too long now. I want to create an environment where the fires don't even have the tools to begin.

Blessings...

Friday, May 11, 2007

Madeleine Mccann

Madeleine McCann

Madeleine McCann Missing in Portugal Have you seen her?

McCann de Madeleine perde em Portugal



God my heart just breaks for that little girl.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Man I'm getting old...

I freecycle'd wanting a VCR locally. A gentleman answered that he had one and today I went to pick it up in a public parking lot. I was in the middle of cleaning, cooking, & I haven't had time to shower today. I pulled my hair back, threw on some OK smelling clothes on and ran out the door, baby in tow. He was standing by his car holding the VCR and man was he eye candy. Shirt and tie, hair perfect, sweet & smiling. Do you know why I'm upset? Because my first thought was, "I wonder if he's single" and I promptly called my mom on the way home. My single mom to taunt her that if she was living here she could have been with me. I looked frumpy and unkempt and just terrible and I didn't even care. I'm married, I have 5 children, I don't have time for anything else. It's a good thing I know but it is kind of sad. My mom did tell me to drive back and leave her e-mail address with him but I didn't do it. LOL

-------------

2 other families and myself do this Girl Scout alternative with our girls called "Keepers of their Homes". It's in the desperate hope that our girls will be more together than any of us are by the time they're married and managing their own homes. So yesterday we talked about Fire Safety in the home. And today my oldest daughter has become the fire safety nazi and I think I regret educating her. "Mom, this smoke detector was laying on the floor in the closet" "Oh...er...um...uh...it's an old one honey!"
"Mom, the one by the kitchen is hanging open with no battery"
"Uh yeah, mom got tired of listening to it every time she cooks honey"
Yeah, I'm a hypocrite. Get used to it kids.

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

From my 5yo tonight...

"Mom, *Oldest Son* won't stop trying to scare me. He told me every night under the bed he feeds my pictures to Smeagal"

Since I was an only child for 21 years I'm going to chalk this up to a normal sibling token of affection. He did have a smile on his face while telling me. Ignorance is bliss. ;-)

Monday, May 7, 2007

Been there, done that, no I DO not want the t-shirt

Being bedridden and wishing you were dead for 4 days prompts a lot of soul searching. Well, it does once the fever subsides and you can't think again in coherent sentences. So please bare with me as I'm pretty shitty sometimes about staying focused on one main idea while I write. As if you haven't noticed. ;-)

Let me start with the disclosure that I'm not one of those people who wants to "take the easy road" in life. I'm not looking to live my life anyway I choose without consequence. I know some people choose religions or ways of life because there is less accountability and they can utter a few words or go to church once a year and feel exhonerated. I'm not looking for that. I still believe in a living God. He's here, He's holding me accountable all the time and He loves me dearly. All that being said let me move on to my point. Or at least try to.

I was raised by a pretty strong woman. She's liberal in her politics, measures success by her job, and well has always believed you don't need a man to do anything. Well except she needed my g'pa one night pretty badly when she caught a mouse in her bedroom with a pot. LOL But for most things, men were accessories, interchangable with your outfits. I guess growing up that way is why when my DH and I got married I was adament it was for life. Thankfully so was he. Everything's fine - we're good, I'm not going there... Let me try again to get to my point. lol

After becoming Christians I felt obligated to play my new "role" well. He grew up in a house of very strong women and although I don't like to perceive myself as a weak woman, I'm definately not a feminist. I like to think of my strengths as emotional and nurturing ones. I do cry... a lot. But I like to think my character is strong, intact. I know it is. But I have had this pesky habit of martyring myself. I hate people who do that and yet, I find myself too often wallowing in the seas of Woeisme. It's not a nice place to wade in folks. It's just not pretty and you aren't satisfied when you're done. Even worse you've floated adrift even further from where you wanted to be when you're done. It just doesn't make any sense to do it!

I was reading a lot about submissiveness and how to be a good wife. And so I swallowed my own thoughts, hopes, ideas for awhile and tried my best to just smile and be by my husbands side ready to overfloweth his cup on call. And while I'd love to say my husband didn't like it I know he did. One of his "love languages" is Acts Of Service you see so he gets off on stuff like that. But what I didn't realize in all my submissive searching was that I did NOT have to submit my own happiness to fulfill his. That was an ephiphany that came to me just this week actually. I can be a great mom, keep a clean house (I think), cook during the week, and be happy too! It doesn't have to always be about everyone else. You see what was happening to me was this submissive role played right into my matrydom which in turn made me angry (displaced anger at DH) which made him angry at me which made us both angry in general and short with the kids, blah, blah, blah. Life was just miserable at times.

So this week I realized that just like I can be a crunchy (organic), poor, attachment-mom Republican; I can be a happy, sometimes selfish, slightly liberal (as compared to some) christian mom & wife. Maybe it's because I'm getting closer to 30 that I'm finally realizing I need to be ME. I've read so many books, watched so many families, listened to so many talk shows. But my family doesn't fit anywhere because it's mine. Ours. And I've been so busy trying to make things perfect that I've gotten rather uptight. I find myself barking and showing my teeth rather than just loving on them and nurturing them all. And I can change that. What good is realizing it if I don't change it? I don't have to DO everything. Or whine about doing everything. DH can help on the weekends. The kids can help all the time. It's not OK for them to destroy things. Yeah, you'd think my ephiphany would have been deeper than this wouldn't you?

I'm just saying I guess I'm tired of wishing I was happy and I'm going to start being happy. I don't need a perfect husband for that. I don't need perfect children for that. I don't need to be perfect for that. *whew* that's a flippin' relief because no one could be. People will remember the delicious meals you cooked for them (I still wish my g'ma was alive to cook her famous london broil). They remember your warm and inviting home (even if the only matching thing about your furniture are the stains). They remember tradition. They remember the essence that surrounds you even long after your gone.

I don't want to be wishing for things to be perfect, I want to start living the way things just are. The only "whine" I want to partake in is the occassional glass that comes with good friends and food around the table. I want to create memories instead of dreaming of the day when we'll be good enough to create them.


OK so now that I've talked about ephiphanies and all that I've got to go watch the "Bachelor: Officer & A Gentleman" episode I T'voed. Hey, I feel really mature when I watch those girls! LOL

Saturday, May 5, 2007

I forgot the best part!

About the Dr... I'm fighting the plague, going on 4 days now of fevers, chills, sweats and just misery. So you'll have to excuse me missing the best part. As he's laying me back palpatating my stomach he says, "Looks like our next president is going to be from NY huh?" I asked him if he was trying to give me palpatations if he meant Hillary. There aren't many people were I'm from that will vote for her, she targeted all the rich folk upstate. He says that must mean I'm a Giulanni fan. Eh, I did like him in the City but I'm not exactly comfortable putting someone like him in control either. I told him I'd probably be voting for the lesser of 2 evils and Hillary always seems to be the most evil. LOL He didn't say much. ;-)

OK so I'm at a "mother's night out" dinner the other night. 2 of my most liberal friends and 2 of my most conservative friends are left at this point. One of our liberal friends say "Did you know Al Gore invented the internet? and one of my conservative friends pipes up and says, "Yeah, he invented Global Warming too". ROFL!!! That was just priceless...

Thursday, May 3, 2007

The Southern Doctor

I couldn't take this plague any longer and I bit the bullet and went into the local walk-in clinic. This is the place that makes me feel about 2 inches tall if I have to bring my kids in and they find out they're not vaccinated. In fact, I'd take my kids to the ER rather than this walk-in clinic. But hey, I followed all the "rules" and I was vaccinated so I went in today.

I'm not a quiet person, by any means. I'm a typical NY'er, I interrupt you mid-sentence, I'm sarcastic, I make loud jokes and laugh at myself. Most of the time people laugh *with* me. Most people I know know me enough that I'm not trying to be rude, It's just how I am. I'm a people pleaser in fact, but I'm a loud one. lol So when I run across a meek and mild person, I just do.not.know.how.to.handle.it. At all.

The Dr walks in, shakes my hand, turns to the sink and washes his hands for a good 2 minutes. He turns around, sits on the stool and just sits there staring at me. Awkward silence fills the room and I can't take it anymore so I start relaying what I told the nurse. He stops me halfway through and says, "where you from?". Originally Long Island, NY I say. "What are you doing 'round here?" he asks. I pause, switching gears and give him the typical "we wanted to raise our family in a slower paced world plus we'd have to live on the streets if we still lived on L.I." spiel. He just listens and nods. Not a word. More awkwardness. He says he spent a year in Brooklyn and I decide to turn the tables and ask him how he liked it. He very quietly, off in his own world starts to speak softly about his time in NYC. "Well, we knew we weren't going to be there long but I realize the things I missed. Cornbread and beans. I'm real southern you see. I even had a black nanny named LeeLou. I missed the dirt roads and driving on the highways late at night and not seeing anyone ahead or behind, that's serenity".
If my head wasn't killing me I'd have found it really amusing. It's more amusing now on Ibuprofen relating the story. Who tells people they had a black nanny? lol He was a kind man although I never could figure out if he liked NY or not, or why he kept asking me why I was here. He didn't laugh at my jokes (but the nurse did, he was cool) so I had nothing left. I just related my symptoms over and over again. When he asked what the worst symptom was I told him it was my headache.

He sent me home with something for my nausea and something for my cough. Nothing for the headache - maybe he wants me to move back to NY? LOL

Lip Synching Baby

OK I know most of y'all requested the singing in the shower one. But DH expressed his hesitation in posting such video and sure enough, there were 80 hits within a few hours of posting it on youtube. So I will e-mail you the video if you'd really like to see it, I'm sort of creeped out how many people wanted to view the video of my 7yo daughter singing in the shower. lol

So here's Lip Synching baby! And Emily, I'll try to upload "White boy dancing" tonight too just for you. ;-)

Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Need to smile?

This video was so funny! What an *adorable* baby with a huge laugh. lol